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I have your attention, don’t I? Well hopefully I have my husband’s attention as well. Stop acting like you’re in the 3rd grade. This 3 letter word is a reality, especially in a marriage. However, it’s not happening until I lose weight.

If you’ve been reading for a while, you understand that my weight and my health has been a major issue. I’ve tried juicing, I’ve tried walking, I’ve tried a diet. However, all of these efforts have been short lived. I’m not one to blame others for my shortcomings. I take responsibility for my lack of weight loss. However, it’s more than me just sticking to a plan. Along with lack of support from my doctors, who seem not to take my pre-diabetes and PCOS seriously, there’s another culprit keeping me from being the healthiest I can be: my husband.

My husband is the ultimate diet sabotager, and that’s not even a word. He’s awful. He tempts me into unhealthy choices like fast food, burgers, and fries. When we go grocery shopping, he still insists on getting something fast and fattening. When I try to adjust and eat healthier, he doesn’t support me. He may be skinny, but I think a healthier diet could help us both out. Instead, he totes Taco Bell and In-N-Out in my face. I try to drink water, he buys sodas. I ask for fruit, he asks for fries. When I ask him to go walking with me, he complains either about the time, the weather, or his back suddenly starts aching. I’m taking matters into my own hands.

I announced to him this weekend that I will not be having sex until I lose weight. He sort of laughed it off, thinking I won’t stick with it, but I have every intention of sticking to my plan. I’m not a prude, and I’m not addicted to sex, so while it’ll be a challenge, I certainly won’t be dying to go against it. Not only that, honestly, I’ve been so uncomfortable with my weight, I have been resisting sex. I don’t feel sexy at all, and I’ve been beyond self conscious about my body. I can’t even look at myself naked, let alone want anyone else doing so. He says he doesn’t have a problem with my body but I do.

So the plan is to lose 30 pounds. As of this morning, I’m back at 191.6 after I had lost weight by incorporating juicing. That’s because hubby’s been wanting pizza and Jack in the Box and blah blah blah. I know, I’m a big girl (literally), I can make my own food choices. However, it’s that much more difficult when the one person who should be supporting you is actually sabotaging your diet. So I’ve taken what may seem to be drastic measures.

I didn’t swear off sex forever. I made some deals. For every 5 pounds lost, we can do the deed. So that’s up to 6 scheduled times haha. I don’t have an actual timeline or deadline, so it’s up to us as to how often that will be. I’m hoping that using this as leverage will be an incentive for him to encourage me and help me with my weight loss. Maybe he’ll actually exercise with me now. Maybe he’ll realize he’s tempting me to eat unhealthy as opposed to going down the BMI chart, since I’m officially obese. These are more hopes than realities.

Most people who see me would beg to differ, but I try to wear clothes that mask the obvious, which doesn’t always work. There will be people who think I’m insane to do this (my BFF has already said I’m crazy). However, my weight is such a burden, such a problem, that I dread sex anyways and feel uncomfortable. So this is what I’m going to do.

So cuddle up babe. You won’t be getting any until I see some results.

What do you think? Is this a good idea or bad idea? TMI? Any tips or suggestions?