There’s always talks about what’s the appropriate way to handle exes when you’re in a new relationship. There’s some people who lay it all on the table as soon as they start dating. There are others who prefer to keep the past in the past. I know people who have an agreement that you should not communicate with any exes, and other people who are comfortable enough to have their significant other still contact their exes. It varies by relationship.
I can understand uneasiness with exes when it comes to most relationships. If someone has been with a person for years and it was serious, it’s can be touchy if you learn your spouse or significant other is still in contact with them. In my relationship, though, it’s a little different. Because hubby and I started dating at 16, we didn’t have too many serious relationships outside of each other. Sure, we dated people and had previous boyfriends and girlfriends, but we’re each other’s longest relationship. This is back when a year was a huge milestone haha. So as our 5 year anniversary of being together is approaching, looking back on previous “relationships” is almost laughable because they weren’t nearly as serious.
So in my marriage, hubby and I both still talk to exes. It’s not a regular occurrence or anything, but we’re friends with exes on Facebook and occasionally receive calls or texts from them. We’re completely open about it and not bothered at all. There’s really only one former boyfriend that I regularly keep in touch with, mainly because we were much better friends than boyfriend/girlfriend. He has a family of his own now, and I actually know his girlfriend. Their daughter is turning one soon and I was invited to the birthday party by his girlfriend.
I asked my mom what would the proper etiquette be. I was grateful to be invited (especially learning that it’s pretty clear that the celebration is invite-only and not one of those invite all your 900+ friends on Facebook kind of thing). My mom said that I should go and I should bring my husband. Not to show off or anything like that, but simply out of respect for all parties involved.
I want to know what you think about how to deal with exes. I’m sure it’s completely different when you’re talking about former long term relationships and definitely a lot different when it comes to former spouses, or parents of your spouse’s children. How do you handle these things in your relationship? Do you keep in touch with any of your exes? Does your spouse?
What ex etiquette tips do you have?