Tej and I have been together for 3 and half years. It’s funny to think we met each other at 16 and this year we’ll be turning 21. We’ve definitely grown together and seen each other grow. Things we used to do when we were younger aren’t on the daily agenda now. He works full time, and so did/do I. We’ve been living together for 9 months, and of course things have changed. One thing we try not to lose sight of is dating each other.
I’m sure you remember when you first met your significant other. You probably went places and did things you had never been before. Out to eat, seeing a movie, restaurants, etc. It was new, it was fun, it was fresh. Fast forward and it’s a battle about toilet seats, dirty dishes, and folding clothes. A lot of couples lose sight of being in love and just sort of love each other out of obligation.
So we set aside times to date. The nice thing about dating is that we’re also best friends. There’s things that I’d usually do with my girl friends or he’d do with his guy friends that we enjoy doing together. Of course we like to go out to eat still. We go to the movies, though not nearly as often (and not nearly as late; matinees are where you can find us now). We enjoy watching TV together. We have shows we’ll watch weekly, and have learned to enjoy each others’ shows. I now have a love for ESPN shows like Pardon the Interruption and Around the Horn. I’ve caught him making comments about The Real Housewives of Atlanta and Basketball Wives. Sacrifices are made, definitely.
We enjoy playing video games, as we’re still young and young at heart. I bought a childhood favorite, Zelda: Ocarina of Time, and had him walk me through stages I couldn’t remember how to beat. Netflix is a personal favorite of ours, as we educate each other on movies the other hasn’t seen before. We don’t get to explore much as his job is physically taxing and schedule could be unpredictable. So we make time to spend with each other at home.
So how do you continue to date your spouse, even after years of being with each other?
- Make time. That’s the hugest thing about dating your spouse. When you first met you probably had all the time in the world, and it suddenly evaporated. You have to make time. Our family time is usually Sundays where we pig out on junk food and watch TV.
- Make plans. It gets you excited when you have something to look forward to. The anticipation of a date can bring the sparks right back to how you remember it.
- Be spontaneous. A few weeks ago, Tej and I decided to go to Universal Studios on a random day. It was great! Waking up and just having the time to be together, no matter where, is a wonderful feeling.
- Be a kid. Who said you have to be an adult all the time? Amusement parks and video games can be for grown ups too. Loosen your tie and leave your e-mail unchecked for a couple of hours.
- Be romantic. Who says that Valentine’s Day and anniversaries are the only days to be romantic? Bring back old memories of first dates, first kisses, or just reminisce.
There’s so many other things you can do to have a good time with your significant other. After a while, people start feeling like a duty rather than someone you love. Remind them why you fell in love with them in the first place.
- The Work Spouse (mzum.wordpress.com)
- Are You Only As Happy As Your Spouse? (huffingtonpost.com)
- Steve Cooper: Why Married Couples Should Celebrate Valentine’s Day (huffingtonpost.com)